Relationships: When You Begin To Suspect That There's No Right Person

Food for Thought



“What about your parents, what will they think of me?”

“I don’t care, all I want is you.”

The first time you said that, you really didn’t mean it. You were probably thinking “Fuck, if my parents find out, I am so screwed!” Also, you were probably too young to be making such promises. The desire to have a partner starts off a little too early for society to accept it, or for you to handle it (quite a sick joke by the gods of love). You are too young to be able to support a child (if you’re dumb enough to have one). You are too naïve to understand that this is primarily raw desire and panic. You are too impulsive to make this last long enough.

Very few individuals are able to say that they didn’t have a crush on anyone in school and most of these individuals are pretentious fucks trying to give off a mentally superior image. The truth is that you can start producing kids by the time you are fifteen, and if this were the stone ages, where the infant mortality rate was 40% and the population of humans on the Earth was approximately 40 million (approximately the population of Tokyo now), it would be a good thing. But we’re in the twenty-first century, where you need to get your ass employed before a girl even considers babies, and you need to have a lot of prerequisites before you can actually say that that kid won’t need psychiatric therapy.



Love is a word tossed around too freely these days. People think that this is the last person they will ever feel comfortable with, and when the said person disappoints them royally, they think every other person will do so too. Inability to cope with a little emotional discomfort makes these people the biggest evasive pansies on the planet.

“I really like you, but I don’t want to spoil what we have. I really value you as a friend.”

“Friends? I have a lot of friends. I don’t need another.”

There is no reason to give up on the institution of a relationship if someone else fails you. You fail too - you didn’t choose the partner with complete understanding of who and/or what they are.

While the odds of a relationship in the early years failing are incredibly high, the frequency of their occurrence is incredibly high too. Someone somewhere is not listening so well. We see them all fail and yet, we still keep trying. Are we retarded? Are we contractually tied down by biology to emotionally screw ourselves like every other lamb before us? Then why are we rolling down this hill, knowing that soft grass at the bottom is a long shot? We just keep doing it!

Then, there is sex. Thirteen-year olds discussing anal and oral is so common these days, it is almost humiliating to the generation before them. Has it failed so badly? Boys, who should clearly be discussing Beyblades, brag about the size of their penises and girls, who should be worrying how they will score on a math test, are worried if they will ever make it to a C cup. Don’t get me wrong, sex should be discussed with them at this age. The mystery and hype needs to be removed, but the insane obsession over sex when it is clearly not on the menu is just hilarious. It’s like when 9th graders discuss the theory of relativity or a Starbucks Barista starts telling his boss how the market trends are going to go. Sex is healthy and sex should happen, but only when you can handle it.

To those who are seventeen or below, the point of a relationship is not touching the boob or getting some tongue action. It is being able to understand how the opposite gender thinks, what they want emotionally and what they dislike. It’s about being able to hold their hand in public and not giggle about it inside. It’s about eating from the same plate as them and not instagramming about it. It is about hugging them when they cry, and ruining their joke with a poor joke. It’s about being comfortable. It’s about having a relationship with ‘someone’ for the ‘someone’, and not to put up statuses about it. It’s about the part that nobody can teach you once you have taught yourself.

“I really like you.”

“I like you too.”

“Be mine till the end of time.”

“Whoa, take it easy. You high or something? We met ten minutes ago. How about we talk for a bit?”

“Oh … all right. Sooo ….”

Photography By: Zubair Alam