Home Isn't A Place, It's A Feeling

In & Out



“Don’t you miss home?”

“Doesn’t this remind you of home?”

“Do you call your parents often? I Skype with my parents everyday.”

Is it a crime being happy where you are? Not being a whiny bitch about how things were better someplace else? Going away from home has made me experience a whole lot of new things, but homesickness isn’t one of them.

While I would love to give the heartbreaker of a story about how my life is incomplete without my family, my food, my bed, my friends back at home and my bathroom, all I really care about is where I am. There is no reason to mope over the fact that you are away from home, because there is no reason to be so sad about it. All the friends you had (irreplaceable as they may be) will be replaced by new friends (if you let it happen), you will find food that you like close by, you will start calling wherever you are staying, all of that, as soon as you stop whining, moping, and being so nostalgic about everything remotely similar to home.

“Back home, I was able to eat all the food I wanted.”

“The weather was much better back home!”

While the mind may take time to get accustomed to a new area, it can throw you multiple depressing thoughts, which will knock your focus and happiness off balance right from the start. Rather than bothering over that, if one focusses on the hunt for the unknown, the transition to an acceptance of surrounding is much more effective. You are the only thing that bothers you; the surroundings are trying their best to inculcate you into the habitat. That’s what systems do - they adapt to streamline. A feather thrown in a river aligns itself with the flow and floats ahead while a rock sinks and gets eroded. It’s simple, don’t sink.

“I used to have so many friends back home”

“Just shut up, bro. You’re depressing me.”

While there’s truth in the fact that some places can be shit and other places can be heaven, the actual value of a place need not be judged by comparison. Comfort can be found on a lower standard than you are used to, but it’s still comfort. It may be found through a local beverage, a secluded location between the trees, an interesting native, a regional festival, or even a simple scenery. In the U.S., any household must have at least one car necessarily, but in Singapore or India having a car can be considered a luxury. We need not whine about what was, because what “can be” clearly has more discussion value.



“Why don’t you try some local ice lime?”

“Damn … This stuff is good!”

What I am trying to reveal is that the past, however eventful, should never hamper your experience of the present. That would only lead to nothing productive. Whose idea was it any way to make the word ‘homesick’? Home is where you are now, however temporary that may be. You don’t need to miss someone or something to respect it. The fact is that instead of feeling bad about the absence, we should just feel good about the occurrence.

Since we are on the topic.

No, I don’t miss my parents, but I still love them.

No, I don’t miss my friends. I cherish them and we still talk.

No, I don’t miss home, because I am home.

Photography By: Mit Ladola